The Walls That Remain
by HecateA
Summary: For many witches and wizards, Kingsley Shacklebolt's first executive order as Minister for Magic felt like it had come out of nowhere. But the seed had been planted in Kingsley's mind for a long time.


**Author's Note: **Enjooooy!

**Disclaimer: **The following characters belong to J.K. Rowling, and this story derives from her original works, storylines, and world. Please do not sue me, I can barely pay tuition.

**Warnings: **Azkaban-related PTSD

* * *

**Stacked with:** MC4A; Shipping War; Rays of Blades; Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry

**Individual Challenge(s): **Gryffindor MC; Seeds; Golden Times; Old Shoes; Trope it Up A (Enemies to Friends to Lovers); Themes and Things A (Change); Themes and Things B (Loss); Ethnic and Present; Rian-Russo Inversion (Y); Flags and Ribbons (Y); Letter of the Day; Short Jog; Yellow Ribbon; Yellow Ribbon Redux

**Representation(s): **Sirius/Kingsley

**Bonus challenge(s): **Abandoned Ship; In the Trench; Second Verse (Tomorrow's Shade); Chorus (Middle Name)

**Tertiary bonus challenge: **NA

**Word Count:** 1197

* * *

_**Hogwarts Submitting Info**_

**House: **Ravenclaw

**Assignment: **Assignment #1, Alchemy, Hermeticism, Task #2: Write about someone inspiring others.

* * *

_**Shipping Wars**_

**Ship (Team): **Sirius Black and Kingsley Shacklebolt (Starry Storms)

**List (Prompt): **Summer Big List (Promise)

* * *

**The Walls That Remain**

When Sirius shot up in bed, it was so violent that the shift in the mattress woke up Kingsley.

"Sirius," he mumbled to himself. That was when he heard the extraordinary efforts Sirius was making to control the rate of his breath. He sat up and asked, more forcibly—more worriedly, "Sirius!"

He put a hand between his shoulder blades and felt them heaving. Kingsley reached out for his wand and it flew to him. He turned on the lights, blinking in the sudden brightness.

Sirius was shaking his head.

"Don't—" Sirius said. "I'm fine."

"No offense, but that's obviously a lie," Kingsley said. Sirius' skin was sickly warm under Kingsley's touch. He threw the blankets off of Sirius' legs and reached for a glass of water. Sirius took it and gulped it down in one shot.

"Don't worry about me," Sirius said again. "Just… just a nightmare."

"A nightmare?" Kingsley asked.

Sirius pulled off his t-shirt and fanned himself, wiping the sweat off his brow.

"About… it doesn't matter."

"Azkaban, isn't it?" Kingsley asked. He didn't mean to press, he out of all people shouldn't. He wasn't just Sirius' whatever-they-were, he was also an Auror and he had to be mindful of that. But had had to know.

"No," Sirius said. "When the Dementors found me again, on the shores of the Black Lake. Harry was there. Honestly, sometimes it feels as if they're… as if they could always come back, any second."

Kingsley chewed his lip.

"Hey," he said quietly. "Hey, that's not true. Come here…"

* * *

Sirius, usually so starved for company, was leaning against the wall during the Order's Christmas party.

"Hey," Kingsley said, drifting towards him. "It seems a little unlike Sirius Black to stand on the sidelines at the Order's hottest event."

Sirius's smile looked painful.

"We've never had the entire Order in the house before," Sirius said plainly.

"I guess you're right," Kingsley realised. "So?"

"So it's… a lot of people," Sirius said. He swallowed nervously, which clashed with Remus' wild stories of a younger Sirius dancing on bar tables before he'd even had time to buy himself a drink upon arrival.

Then again, Kingsley had accompanied Fudge on official visits to Azkaban more than once. He knew how straight and narrow the halls were, and just how careful the architects had been to space out the cells so that the windows and doors didn't face one another.

So Kingsley took a swig of his drink, and leaned against the wall with him, away from the buzzing crowd.

* * *

"Slow down, Sirius," Molly said over dinner. "You're going to give yourself a stomach ache."

Sirius put a hand in front of his mouth and slowed his chewing. Until Kingsley watched Sirius slow bit by bit like that, he hadn't realised just how quickly he always ate.

"Sorry Molly," Sirius said when his mouth was empty. "Force of habit. This is delicious…"

Kingsley took a deep breath, and then grabbed Sirius' hand under the table.

* * *

Kingsley was doing his damned best not to wake up Sirius as he tried to scavenge for the clothes he'd need to head to work today. But it was while he was looking down at the floor that he noticed something peculiar.

All of Sirius' things—the books he was reading, the shoes he wore daily, his wand, his watch—were concentrated in a small percentage of the room. Really, the mess was all Kingsley's. Sirius wasn't using all the space available to him.

Kingsley frowned at the oddity of it, and then plotted out the size of Sirius' habited space in his head. About five square metres, give or take. Approximately the size of a cell.

He pulled on his sweater and his Auror robes, and circled back to bed to kiss Sirius' forehead before heading off to work.

"Kings?" Sirius mumbled.

"Yeah?" Kingsley called back.

"Why'd you do that?" Sirius said again. "You usually just go."

"I thought you may need it," Kingsley said. He chewed on his lip. There was a lot more that Sirius might need, quite frankly, and Kingsley wasn't sure how to... "Go back to sleep. I'll see you later, yeah?"

"Yeah," Sirius mumbled back, sleepily.

* * *

"Do you think it's easy?" Sirius snapped at Kingsley. "Do you think that just because—just because it's hard for you, just because you wish I would talk to you more, I can just magically be this perfect chirpy boyfriend who stays on top of communication and washes his hair every day and remembers not to hate himself? Because it's not that fucking easy Kingsley. I left Azkaban but Azkaban didn't leave me, and I'm sorry if that's hard for you because meanwhile I am having a _really great time _with it and I so wish you could come join me in this beautiful magical paradise I'm currently in!"

It was mean. It was harsh. It was snappy and sarcastic and rude. It was a rather big reaction for what Kingsley had intended as a simple, throwaway comment about how much he wished Sirius would talk more about how his days were going. It hit Kingsley where he didn't want to be hit, but it was the most honest thing Sirius Black had ever told him and the most words on the subject of Azkaban that had ever come out of his mouth at once.

Kingsley held out his hand and Sirius frowned for a second and shot him a questioning look before taking it.

"I'm sorry, you're right," Kingsley said. "But since you started, can we talk about..."

Just then, Remus Lupin swung into the kitchen, breathless.

"Snape just sent a message from Hogwarts," Remus said. "Harry's gone—Ron, Hermione, and Ginny too, and two other children..."

"Harry," Sirius breathed. He dropped Kingsley's hand. "Well what are we waiting for? We have to go find him."

* * *

"Mr Minister," Hestia Jones, one of the last trustable Aurors left, said. The words sent a kind of terror through Kingsley, but he answered to them. They would feel right one day. And that day better come soon, because with Voldemort fallen… well, there was going to be more work to do than Kingsley could probably even imagine at this moment.

"Mr Minister, what do you want us to do about… see, the Dementors are all gone but we have these Death Eaters everywhere. What do you want us to do about Azkaban?" Hestia asked.

Kingsley didn't answer immediately, but it wasn't because he didn't know what to say. Oh no; Kingsley's answer was quite simple and it came to him easily. Sirius' face flashed in Kingsley's memory for a second; the way he laughed, but also the way he woke up from nightmares panting, the way he startled at loud sounds… Kingsley had promised Sirius very few things over the course of the bitterly short months that they'd known each other. They were both realists. But he had promised to make everything right.

"Shut it down," he said.

"Mr Minister?" Hestia asked, the shock and confusion in her voice coming through.

"You heard me," Kingsley repeated. As he said it, his first executive order as Minister for Magic felt right. "Shut it down."


End file.
